Insane Censorship: Terminator 1 - German VHS (1992)

Welcome back to the Retro Bloginator!

Let's start with the fact I'm a huge fan of The Terminator, hence the blog name.

Although I do love Terminator 2: Judgment Day, "THE Terminator" movie from 1984 will always be my favourite.

I could list a hundred reasons why, but my main 3 are:

1) Arnold Schwarzenegger as a bad guy. If you want to epitomise "unstoppable cyborg", then the large frame of Arnie is it. As much as Lance Henriksen (who ended up playing Detective Hal Vukovich) being The Terminator and blending into the crowd would have been a great concept (later mastered by Robert Patrick as the T-1000 in T2), you actually believe Arnie will not stop, ever, until Sarah Connor is dead. That is truly terrifying.

2) The "Tech-Noir" tone of the film. A spin on "Film-Noir", the darkness and gritty backdrop of downtown Los Angeles mixed with human's dependence on machines and technology is blended seamlessly. Even the ending has a melancholic feel. Yes, the battle was won, but the impending war is still to come.

3) The soundtrack is perfect. Brad Fiedel’s score sets the scene throughout. It has a fully synthesised sound, which is not only appropriate for the time period but is also so relevant because he’s using machines to make the music. Plus, the generic 80’s pop from Tahnee Cain & The Tryanglz (a faux group put together specifically to record songs for the movie), Linn van Hek and Jay Ferguson & 16mm is fun to hear either through Ginger’s Toshiba KT-S3 mkII portable cassette player or at the Technoir nightclub.

As a Terminator collector, when I saw the German VHS versions of Terminator 1, 2 & 3 for sale for only €1 each on eBay, I had to get them. I don’t even understand German.

The first thing I noticed was the title on the case. It is “Terminator 1”. I can understand the 1 being added to differentiate it from the recently released “Terminator 2” at the time, but it’s not something you see on English versions of the release post 1991. The other thing was the movie was not a trans literal adaptation of the English title and called “Der Terminator”. Before 1991, it was just known as “Terminator”. There is acknowledgment of the “originaltitel” “The Terminator” on the back.

The description on the back reads:

Im Jahr 1984 schickte Regisseur und Drehbuchautor James Cameron zwei Kämpfer aus der vom Nuklearkrieg verwüsteten Zukunft in die Gegenwart. Ihr gemeinsames Ziel: Sarah Connor (LINDA HAMILTON) zu finden, deren ungeborener Sohn einmal die Menschheit retten wird. Der Killer-Cyborg aus dem Jahr 2029 handelt im Auftrag von Computern, die die Menschheit auslöschen wollen. Der andere, ein junger Soldat, der ebenfalls durch die Zeit zurückgeschickt wurde, hat den Auftrag, Sarah zu beschützen. In dem Action-Klassiker gerät er zwischen den schier unzerstörbaren Terminator (ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER) und die junge Frau, von deren Überleben die Zukunft der Menschheit abhängt. 

In 1984, director and screenwriter James Cameron sent two fighters from the nuclear war-ravaged future to the present.  Their common goal: to find Sarah Connor (LINDA HAMILTON), whose unborn son will one day save humanity. The killer cyborg from 2029 acts on behalf of computers that want to wipe out humanity.  The other, a young soldier who was also sent back through time, has the task of protecting Sarah.  In the action classic, he gets caught between the almost indestructible Terminator (ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER) and the young woman, on whose survival the future of mankind depends.

There are 3 signs that this version of the film is censored:

1) Under the description it reads “Neu bearbeitete Fassung”. Translated as “Newly edited Version”.

2) The film is given a 16 rating, meaning you shouldn’t watch if you’re under 16. From what I can tell, the theatrical release in West Germany was given an 18 rating (but still had cuts).

3) The “Spieldauer” (translated as Playing time) is only 97 minutes. The Virgin Video 1988 release I have from the UK is 103 minutes. The original Thorn EMI HBO Video 1985 release I have on Laserdisc from the USA is 108 minutes. That’s slightly over 10% of the movie censored.

So, let’s get stuck into it. Where will the first cut be?

The first one, to my surprise, was when the Terminator arrives at the Griffith Observatory. Instead of the part where you see the fully naked rear of Arnie's body overlooking the vast city of Los Angeles, it instead cuts to a freeze-frame and gives a small prologue:

Der Terminator ist die Geschichte eines programmierten Roboters.

The Terminator is the story of a programmed robot.

Äusserlich in menschlicher Gestalt, ist er eine Maschine ohne Emotionen.

Outwardly in human form, he is a machine without emotions.

Eine Maschine ist weder gut noch böse, sie funktioniert.

A machine is neither good nor bad, it works.

Der Film schildert den dramatischen Versuch, diese Maschine zu stoppen.

The film depicts the dramatic attempt to stop this machine.

This for me seems a strange way to start the film. For the most part, it's kind of obvious. Plus, there's already another prologue before this scene. However, the part stating it's neither good nor bad is a concept I've never really thought of before. It's just a computer machine, performing what it is programmed to do. Therefore, the Terminator is not bad, however its programmer could be considered so (to the human race, in any case).

The next scene though I was expecting a cut, and I wasn't disappointed. The Terminator confronts 3 punks and asks for their clothes. The punk leader, played by the late and awesome Bill Paxton, politely tells him where to go. Knives get drawn and then, next second, there's only 1 punk (Brad Rearden), frightened and undressing himself whilst the Terminator slowly approaches him with blood covered from his elbow down to his fingertips. Obviously, someone has died a painful death, but was it the punk leader or the other punk (Brian Thompson)? Or was it both of them? German viewers will never know who and how they died. In the context of the story, it probably really doesn't matter.

The next cut happens at the Alamo Sport Shop. The Terminator enquires about a whole arsenal of guns, including one which hasn't yet been invented. After agreeing to take all of them, the shop clerk (Dick Miller) seems excited and turns to get some paperwork for the Terminator to sign, whilst the Terminator calmly loads cartridges into the 12-gauge auto-loader shotgun. Cut to Kyle Reese (Michael Biehn) sawing off the wooden butt of the shotgun he's acquired. What happened at the Alamo? I'd like to think the Terminator paid in cash and bribed the clerk to waive the 15 days wait on the handguns.

The Terminator arrives at Sarah Connor's house (the first one in the phone book, played by Marianne Muellerleile). He knocks on the door and a middle-aged woman opens the door slightly, as far as the security chain will allow. The Terminator robotically asks "Sarah Connor?". Once the woman confirms this, the Terminator pushes the door ajar, smashing the security chain. We then move on to the next scene with our main Sarah Connor counting tips at Big Jeff's, the restaurant she works as a waitress. Her colleague, Nancy (Shawn Schepps), accosts her and rushes her to the staff lunchroom, where a portable black and white television shows the news report of the recently murdered mother of 2, Sarah Connor. At least this cut works, with the next scene explaining what happened in the previous scene.

We move forward to the year 2029. Kyle Reese throws a fusion grenade at the tracks of a Hunter-Killer. What's a Hunter-Killer? Imagine Johnny 5 from Short Circuit on steroids and out for murderous revenge. Another young female resistance fighter (Jean Malahni) does the same, but is spotted by the H-K. Its gun turret moves to her direction. We then see Reese show a look of disappointment and sorrow and then makes a run for it before the fusion grenade explodes. I guess she didn't make it? Either that or it was a really shit throw and Reese is being a dick.

Back in 1984, Ginger Ventura (Bess Motta), Sarah's housemate, has made herself a post-coital sandwich, poured a glass of milk and is heading back to the bedroom. Her boyfriend, Matt Buchanan (Rick Rossovich - Slider from Top Gun) is thrown headfirst through the bedroom door, startling Ginger, ruining her snack as it all falls to the floor. The phone then rings and the distracted Terminator points his laser-sighted AMT Hardballer .45 Longslide at the phone, whilst a Toshiba TCD-30 Automatic Telephone Answering System (remember them?) starts playing its recorded message. The Terminator then goes back to ensuring Ginger has been successfully terminated. So, this cut kind of makes sense, but it could have been done so much better. At least they could have played a couple of seconds more to show the Terminator raising and aiming his gun at the fleeing Ginger.

On to TechNoir, the nightclub where everything on trend in 1984 is to be found, including Sarah Connor. A couple of cuts to be found in the scene, involving patrons getting gunned down in a hail of Uzi 9mm fire whilst the Terminator tries to shoot both Reese and Sarah. The giveaway to where the cuts are is in the music. Just as the Terminator loads a clip to terminate Sarah, Reese jumps out and fires a shot from his shotgun. Sarah then looks outside to see the Terminator rise up from shards of glass sprawled all over the footpath. Either Reese's shotgun is the most powerful known to man, or there's been a cut...

The Terminator ends up in some derelict room to do some damage repair. He removes his glove and lifts up his jacket sleeve to show a shotgun wound to his forearm. He grabs a scalpel. Instead of cutting his arm to repair his hand movement, I think he used it to cut some 35mm and move to the next scene, where a handcuffed Reese is being interrogated at the police station. 

The next cut is probably the smoothest out of all of them. The Terminator is this time treating his wounded eye. But instead of graphic eye surgery, he instead washes it out, wipes it with a towel and we then see the glowing red eye. If I'm being pedantic, we know his eye isn't as damaged as to how we see it before he places his iconic Gargoyles sunglasses on, but I'll give them some artistic licence on this one.

On to the police station massacre. I was really interested to see how this was going to play out seeing what had been already cut. We start off with the "I'll be back" statement, "Ich komme wieder". The Terminator comes back by ramming a car into the front desk of the police station. The Desk Sergeant (Bruce M. Kerner) may have not been crushed but looking at the carnage left as the Terminator gets out of the car, I'm not liking his chances. 

I was actually surprised at what they left in. You actually do see cops getting gunned down, but not for prolonged periods. Again, you can tell where there's been a cut by the music. Lieutenant Ed Traxler (Paul Winfield) fires at the Terminator from behind. The Terminator about turns and fires back. Do Terminators make mistakes? Maybe he missed and Traxler made it out alive. Also, you don't see Detective Vukovich get any shots off. He was probably on a cigarette break.

Back to the future, a Terminator infiltrates a resistance compound and wipes out anything that moves. But not in this version. There's lots of phased plasma rifle fire (assumedly in the 40-watt range). I think they were all warning shots so that the humans can escape. Also, no dogs get killed in this version, and that's alright by me!

Heading towards the end of the movie, the Terminator gets rammed off of his motorbike by the pickup truck Sarah's driving. A tanker truck slows down to see what all the fuss is about. The driver gets out, makes sure his tyres are roadworthy before the Terminator grabs him and pushes him to the floor. He limps up to the driver's side door (obviously the injury was caused by falling off of the motorbike and NOT by being run over by the tanker). He takes a seat and tells the driver's mate to "Get out" (in German).

Finally, the last cut is when the injured Sarah checks out Reese to make sure he's still alive. Thankfully it's just a mild concussion.

Final thought: The gorier scenes I was completely expecting not to be in there. The sex and nudity I were expecting to be in there (I remember seeing German TV on my Sky satellite receiver in the UK and it's pretty liberal). But cutting scenes like the first Sarah Connor getting killed did not make any sense to me. In the full version, you don't even see her getting killed. So, they technically only cut the action of the Terminator shooting at her. The scene where Ginger getting killed was laughable. It was so poorly edited. If I was a 16-year-old German and I bought this video in 1992, I would have wanted my money back. I would have then travelled over the border and got a better version. Also, I believe there are more cuts than just listed above, but these were the visual ones I noticed. I'm sure there were language cuts too, but not understanding spoken German I couldn't say for sure.

I hope you enjoyed this blog! "I'll be back" with more retro goodness soon!